Having an orgasm is experiencing one of life’s greatest pleasures.
The body’s response to sexual pleasure can make her toes curl, face flush, and feel like internal fireworks flowing all throughout her body during a female orgasm.
Here’s the bad news though. It’s not an easy process for every woman.Consider this disparity.
Most men, around 90 percent, have an orgasm during intercourse, while women only have an orgasm during intercourse around 50 percent of the time.
So the takeaway here is that women might need a little extra help in order to achieve the big “O”.
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If you want to help her get to the point of having the best orgasm possible, below are some tips on how to have an orgasm that will help make her sexual experience memorable.
Yes, it’s estimated that around 10-15 percent of women have never had one. However, Promescent makes a warming gel that can help your partner finally achieve an orgasm
The G-spot, is located two to three inches inside the vaginal canal at the front of the vaginal wall. Hook your finger inside, and tap the spongy area of the vaginal wall under where her urethra is on the outside of her vagina.
The C-Spot or clitoris is located under the clitoral hood which is where the inner labia meet at the top of the vulva but below the pubic bone
While there are several techniques for helping you achieve an orgasm some of the most common include the use of sex toys, oral stimulation, masturbation and the right sexual postions
The best sex positions for female orgasm are ones that help to stimulate the G-spot. includes the following:
Cowgirl:A reverse straddle where the woman is on top facing the man’s feet.
Doggy Style: Penetrating from behind while the woman is on her knees.
Missionary Legs Up: Man on top with the woman’s legs over his shoulders.
On Top:Woman on top with the man’s legs pressed together.
Spooning: Both people laying on their sides with the man entering from behind.
All of these positions should have the tip and shaft of the man’s penis rubbing against the female G-spot.
She may not be able to tell if it’s being stimulated per se, but the positioning might help her orgasm easier.
Expert Insight: Discover how much longer you can last with these must try sex positions from our 12 best sex positions to last longer in bed article.
Understanding the Female Anatomy
The female anatomy is beautiful, but complex.
Understanding the outer and inner workings of everything that makes up this zone of the body is key to bringing around the right pleasure response.
You need to know exactly what makes up all the parts of the female anatomy.
Don’t be embarrassed if you aren’t sure where everything is located. It’s never too late to learn.
Although most people refer to the female genitalia as the ‘vagina,’ the reality is that this is just ONE part of the female sexual anatomy.
The correct term for the complete female sexual anatomy is the vulva, which includes the clitoris, the labia majora (outer lips), and the labia minora (inner lips).
There is also the vagina which leads into the vaginal canal. All of these parts are engaged and working together during sexual activity.
Other hotspots include the perineum and the anus if she enjoys having those parts of her body touched as well.
Many women derive increased pleasure from being touched in all these areas.
Of course, you always want to check with her about her preferences, what she likes, and what she may not like.
She may be shy about voicing what she enjoys, but the more you understand about her anatomy the better off you’ll both be in exploring her needs in bed.
Let’s get a little deeper into exploring the pleasure zones of the female anatomy regarding a couple of key areas.
The G-Spot
Do you know how to locate her G-spot?
The Grafenberg spot, or G-spot, as it’s more commonly called, is an important part of the female sexual anatomy.
It’s named for the German gynecologist who discovered this erogenous zone back in the 1940s.
Some sex researchers feel that the G-spot is an extension internally of the outer clitoris.
They also feel that stimulation of the G-spot could trigger a vaginal orgasm.
There is some disagreement on the subject though, which is why the G-spot continues to be a mystery to many people.
Since it’s also inside the woman’s vaginal canal, it’s also a spot that you can’t see with your own eyes.
That makes it more complicated to find because it’s not just right out in the open.
Don’t worry though, here are the instructions to locate this spot.
In order to find the G-spot, it’s located two to three inches inside the vaginal canal at the front of the vaginal wall.
Hook your finger inside, and tap the spongy area of the vaginal wall under where her urethra is on the outside of her vagina.
Stimulating this spot can lead to female ejaculation during an orgasm.
Scientists have studied the sexual responses in women by using an ultrasound to see the physiological changes to the G-spot during sexual activity.
The spot slightly swells up during arousal, may feel a little bumpy, and stimulation from it can feel a bit different for everyone.
Touching this spot with your finger during manual stimulation of the outer vulva, including the clitoris, can bring about an orgasm easier for many women.
Using both hands to get the job done is the way to go with this one if she struggles to have an orgasm during intercourse alone.
There are also specific styles of sex toys that are meant to target the G-spot during sexual activity that may help get her to orgasm faster.
Exploring the G-spot may be one of the keys to making her experience feel a lot better.
Starting with light pressure, and just one finger, touch the clitoris and gently rub in a circular motion.
Increase the number of fingers to two or three in order to touch more of the surface around the clitoris.
We recommend using our Female Arousal Gel when performing this form of stimulating pleasure.
She should be able to tell you whether or not she likes more or less intense pressure.
Vary your strokes a bit by going up and down, side to side, and in the circular motion.
You may need to increase your speed and rhythm, as well, to bring her to orgasm by touching the clitoris.
Keep in mind that every woman is different. How they like to be touched is a personal experience that she may or may not be able to explain.
The more you communicate with her the better off you’ll be in figuring out what she wants in bed.
4 Techniques for Having Orgasms
1: Sex Toys
Sex toys can add that extra something a woman needs to climax.
There are toys that you can use on her or wear while having sex to provide that extra clitoral stimulation.
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Some types of sex toys she may enjoy trying with you are vibrators, dildos, and vibrating cock rings.
The last type especially can help to stimulate the clitoris because it is a ring that goes around the penis, and has a vibrating bullet-shaped device on top that will rub against her clitoris during intercourse.
A vibrator with a clitoral attachment that can stimulate her both externally and internally while inserted is a good idea.
Explore different options until she finds the one that makes all her orgasm dreams come true.
It may also be a fun date night to shop for these toys together.
Many upscale sex shops cater to couples and go the extra mile to make sure the woman doesn’t feel shy about exploring her needs when it comes to sex toys.
They may have some very helpful salespeople that can show you some of the options and will answer any questions you may have about certain toys.
Purchase a few different styles to use in the bedroom.
You never really know what’s going to help her achieve orgasm until you try some of these fun devices.
2: Oral Stimulation
Going down on your partner may help her climax easier.
The combination of your mouth and your fingers can help her achieve a smashing, earth-shattering climax.
This is especially true if you try the Kivin Method. This is where you position yourself horizontally instead of vertically under her leg.
By using this position it can give you access to more surface area of her clitoris with the ability to use your tongue going left to right, instead of up and down.
Some people find this actually feels better than the traditional oral sex positioning and can make her climax much faster.
Be generous with the amount of oral sex you provide your partner. This goes for her as well as one of the most fun and rewarding parts of sexual activity.
3: The Right Sexual Positions
The right sexual position can also put her in a better place to orgasm.
The woman on top position is usually successful.
This includes the fact that friction can be achieved with her on top rubbing her clitoris against the man’s pubic area during intercourse.
She’s able to control the speed and rhythm more easily during sex as opposed to the man being on top. Sometimes it’s hard for her to orgasm in the basic missionary position.
Expert Insight: Interested in last in longer? Check out this insightful article about which sex positions will help you last longer in bed.
Or some people prefer doggy style because she can stimulate her clitoris herself, or you can reach around and touch her during intercourse.
Don’t be afraid to experiment with all kinds of different positions.
It may be helpful to purchase a book that has some easy to understand diagrams of things you can try in bed.
Seeing pictures or diagrams make complex positions easier to understand than just reading descriptions about them.
Try the “Little Black Book of Sex Positions” or the tried and true, “Kama Sutra” which has been around in one form or another since 400 BC.
There are many books about Kama Sutra (the name of the erotic God of love) for beginners which are easy to understand and use in your own bedroom.
4: Masturbation
There are some women out there that have never had an orgasm. It’s estimated that around 10-15 percent of women have never had one.
Encourage her to masturbate, if she doesn’t already, to figure out what feels best on her own.
Then you can continue to explore how to make her climax together, but until she is able to cross over that threshold alone, she may be too self-conscious to have one with a partner.
Still Struggling? Extra Help With Female Arousal Gel
If your partner is still struggling to have an orgasm, there is a product that you can try together.
It’s our Promescent Female Arousal Gel. As a warming gel that you apply to the clitoris, it’s a game-changer when it comes to making the woman feel extra sensations.
Women can use it solo or with a partner during sex.
It feels super slick and smooth for an extra sexy experience that caters to female arousal in just the right way.
Setting the Mood
Getting ready to have an orgasm also needs to have the right mood in place.
That might include putting on some sexy lingerie, lighting some candles, having a glass of wine, and taking the time to cater to her needs.
Sometimes it’s hard to give in to the mental and physical aspects of sexual enjoyment when life is so stressful.
Having a stressful job, a busy family life with kids, and a home to take care of can sometimes make a woman feel like having an orgasm is just another thing to think about on her huge to-do list.
It can be hard for her to turn off her brain to enjoy being in the moment of sexual pleasure.
The more you can help her relax, let go, and give in to the experience of the wonderful sensations had during sex, the more likely she’ll be able to orgasm.
Sex should be a relaxing, but stimulating part of the day that you look forward to for a sexual release that is great for your body, as well as, your mind.
That post-orgasm glow is real.
Plus, the more satisfying sex you have the better connection you’ll have with your partner.
Consider Adding Lube
For frictionless pleasure, consider using lube.
Many women don’t naturally get very lubricated during sex. This can be due to hormonal reasons, body type, and medications they might be taking.
You can easily compensate for this fact by using just the right lubrication.
Our Promescent family of lubrication is here for you.
We have many different styles of lube to suit every lifestyle. That includes the following types of lubricant:
Water Lube: This is 100 percent paraben-free, non-greasy, and fragrance-free. You’ll love how slippery and unique it feels to make sex more comfortable.
Organic Lube: An all-natural, aloe-based lubricant that is made with organic quinoa, flax, hemp, green tea extract, and oat to help soften and rejuvenate the skin.
Silicone Lube: Hypoallergenic and made of high-grade materials, this is the lube for someone that likes it a little thicker than our Water Lube.
All of our lubricants are safe to use with condoms, work well with sex toys, and clean up very easily. They are long-lasting with just a little bit used to go the distance during all of your sexual activities.
High-quality lube like our selection at Promescent makes all the difference in the world during sexual activity. It’s going to feel exceptional for you both.
If you have never tried using lube during sexual activity before, you both will love how extra slick it is to spice up your bedroom escapades.
That extra lubrication will also help her prevent feeling sore inside her vaginal canal. Sometimes when women are feeling uncomfortable during sex, they don’t readily speak up about it. They just prefer to suffer in silence.
Being properly lubricated will help her enjoy sex more and ultimately will lead to a better orgasm.
Takeaways
The bottom line is that every woman experiences sexual pleasure differently. In some cases, a woman may be suffering from a low libido. If that's the case, libido booster for women may help her out.
But knowing some tips and techniques to make the process more exciting and engaging for them will help her achieve an orgasm, if it doesn’t come easy for her.
Just be patient with her needs.
Knowledge, along with experimentation, will make the process to orgasm much easier. It’s going to be a fun ride at least.
She’s going to get there where the sexual fireworks happen for her.
The more you know about what she enjoys, the better off the experience will be for both of you.
Dr. Laura Berman PhD is an acclaimed relationship expert, award-winning radio host on her show 'Uncovered Radio' and a NY Times best-selling author. Dr. Berman has a doctorate from New York University with an emphasis on human sexuality. She is also a member of AASECT, SSSS, the International Society for the study of Women's Sexual Health and the American Urologic Society.
Sources:
Absorption Pharmaceuticals LLC (Promescent) has strict informational citing guidelines and relies on peer-reviewed studies, academic or research institutions, medical associations, and medical experts. We attempt to use primary sources and refrain from using tertiary references and only citing trustworthy sources. Each article is reviewed, written, and updated by Medical Professionals or authoritative Experts in a specific, related field of practice. You can find out more about how we ensure our content is accurate and current by reading our editorial policy.
Osmo Kontula, Researcher Professor, PhD, and Anneli Miettinen, Researcher, MSSc. 2013 October 25. Determinants of female sexual orgasms. National Center for Biotechnology Information (NCBI). https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5087699/#:~:text=Previous%20studies%20have%20provided%20consistent,2001%3B%20Kontula%2C%202009). Accessed 27 Jan 2022.
MedlinePlus Staff. (n.d). Orgasmic dysfunction in women. National Library of Medicine - MedlinePlus. https://medlineplus.gov/ency/article/001953.htm#:~:text=About%2010%25%20to%2015%25%20of,for%20an%20orgasm%20to%20happen. Accessed 27 Jan 2022.
The Content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition.
