7 Best Sexual Wellness Books To Help With Your Love Life

When it comes to sexual wellness, you can never know too much. Here is a list of the best books we could find on the subject.

The Promescent Team
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by The Promescent Team Last updated 12/11/2023
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‘Self-help’ books have always been a go-to for people looking to solve a unique problem.

They help people gain insight into how someone else might have overcome challenges others might or might not have faced before.

It sometimes really does take on an outside perspective to make you realize you’ve been doing something wrong for a long time - and that is what a lot of people experience with sexual wellness books. 

These books are all about the ins and outs, if you will, of sex and what things you can do to up your game in bed. Of course, there are tons of books out there, how do you choose?

Well, these are some of our favorites to get you started!

1. So Tell Me About the Last Time You Had Sex: Laying Bare and Learning to Repair Our Love Lives - Ian Kerner

So tell me about the last time you had sex by Ian Kerner

Ian Kerner has literally been called the "Sherlock Holmes of the Bedroom." So Tell Me About the Last Time You Had Sex is like Kerner's magnifying glass into your sex life disguised as a sexual wellness book, and we love it!

You may recognize Ian Kerner from his prior book, She Comes First, which was touted as the "secret weapon" for "ill-cliterate" men and highly praised by women and men alike.

This new book takes a totally new approach, though: giving all genders the tools they need to:

  • Assess sexual experiences
  • Fix what is getting in the way of mutual pleasure
  • Expand sexual knowledge
  • Discuss sexual problems
  • Find fixes for problems that interfere with happy endings

So Tell Me About the Last Time You Had Sex was created with decades of research into sexual science, but the book is filled with digestible information, fun homework assignments for couples, and a wealth of insight.

You literally get to take a good, hard look at your sex life from every angle, pluck out details that matter and fix problems with sexual syncing.

2. A Field Guide to Men's Health: Eat Right, Stay Fit, Sleep Well, and Have Great Sex - Forever

 Book from Jesse Mills MD: A Field Guide to Men's Health

As the Director of the Men's Clinic at UCLA and health specialist for the LA Dodgers and LA Lakers Dr. Jesse Mills MD has an extensive background in helping men live happier, healthier, and longer lives.

In this Field Guide to Men's Health, Dr. Mills takes a deep dive into why men are so reluctant to go to the doctor. From common myths about men's health to just plain bad advice.

This exciting new book will help you gain a clear understanding of all aspects of your well being as well as give you advice on everything from heart and mental health to diet and exercise.

This easy to follow and comprehensive approach to men's health includes:

  • Tips for cardiovascular health
  • Stress management techniques
  • Sexual health tips with an owner's guide to your penis 
  • Communication tips
  • Exercises
  • Better sleep habits
  • Nutritional guidance


3. Quantum Love: Use Your Body's Atomic Energy to Create the Relationship You Desire - Dr. Laura Berman

Quantum Love: Use Your Body's Atomic Energy to Create the Relationship You Desire - Dr. Laura Berman

Dr. Laura Berman has this incredible way to use her clinical knowledge about sex to deliver information to enhance our sex lives, which is why her voice has stuck around for over two decades.

Quantum Love could be deemed as one of the best sexual wellness books of the 21st century, and we're not at all surprised.

By tapping into the latest research, Dr. Berman uses Quantum Love to explain how couples can reach new heights of intimacy, whether they are just starting out or have been sexually interacting for years by tapping into their own core energies.

Berman places a new perspective on taking a feeling-centered approach to sex, which goes way beyond just technique. Some reviewers have said what they've learned in the book has all-out created magic in bed.

As an adage, Quantum Love delivers a lesson on reaching those fulfilling sex and love lives in spite of being beyond the thrilling introductory stage in a relationship when sex is often at its best.

Yet, with a transcending message that can touch people at all stages in life, this book has something for everyone.

From offering a full guide on how to have quantum sex (yes, please!) to giving readers a way to break through the hum-drum of lackluster sexual routines, the book has a bit of everything.

4. The 21st Century Man - Dr. Judson Brandeis

Book cover for 21st Century Man by Dr. Judson Brandeis

Every man over 35 needs to own and read this comprehensive health guide for men.

60 board-certified doctors and men’s health experts offer advice and insider secrets that men over 35 need to recover and maintain their physical, mental, and sexual health to feel great, look good, and have better intimacy.

Emphasizing prevention and early intervention, The 21st Century Man has sections on the most common causes of mortality, nutrition, exercise, aesthetics, addiction, mental health, relationships, lifestyle and health insurance.

There is an extensive section on sexual health and sexual medicine written by an all-star cast of physicians.

Lead author, Dr. Judson Brandeis, voted the best urologist in the SF Bay Area for a decade, is a researcher, physician educator, and a caring clinician and surgeon.

A graduate of Brown University, Vanderbilt Medical School, UCLA Urology residency, and Harvard for research, he specializes in the emergent field of men’s sexual health and rejuvenative medicine.

5. Tell Me What You Want: The Science of Sexual Desire and How It Can Help You Improve Your Sex Life - Dr. Justin J. Lehmiller

Tell Me What You Want: The Science of Sexual Desire and How It Can Help You Improve Your Sex Life - Dr. Justin J. Lehmiller

Dr. Justin Lehmiller took on the task of performing one of the most comprehensive studies ever on sexual fantasies.

This enormous, two-year study involved responses from over 4,000 Americans. The conclusion to the study is this profound book on the psychology of sexual desire.

Tell Me What You Want dives into how unique sexual fantasies can be depending on the person.

Based on the wealth of information from the one-of-a-kind study, Lehmiller gives insight into:

  • What fantasies are popular among what groups of people
  • How fantasies can be driven by psychology
  • Why sexual desire diversity exists among all people
  • Why you/your partner should be able to openly communicate about fantasies guilt-free

With an understanding of why fantasy and sexual desire can be unique to the person, we learn to understand our partners and feel more open about sharing our own ideas.

Tell Me What You Want is an incredible sexual wellness read if you struggle with shame because of your private sexual thoughts.

On the same note, it is a good book for those who have issues understanding what makes their partner tick in bed or who have found fault in a partner for disclosing a fantasy different from their own.

6. The Penis Book: A Doctor's Complete Guide to the Penis—From Size to Function and Everything in Between - Aaron Spitz MD

The penis book by Aaron Spitz

So, how many times have you had a question about the penis but never asked? If this sounds familiar, The Penis Book is definitely for you.

This book, written by regular The Doctors guest Dr. Spitz (clinical professor at UC Irvine's Department of Urology), is like the guide you never knew existed to understanding the penis.

From an up-close look at how the penis actually functions to sexually transmitted infections, you'll learn more about the penis than you ever thought you needed to know.

Like, did you know you can follow a five-step plan to make sure your peen is working at its finest? Bet you never knew there is literal "Fake News" surrounding the penis that every man should know.

Dr. Spitz may be a famed urologist now, but the author/TV personality was also a stand-up comic in his former life.

The Penis Book weaves that sense of humor in with wit, facts, and insight to give a perfectly enjoyable book on sexual wellness totally focused on male genitalia.

7. Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science that Will Transform Your Sex Life - Emily Nagoski, Ph.D.

Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science that Will Transform Your Sex Life - Emily Nagoski, Ph.D.

Geared specifically toward women, Come as You Are is an all-out deep-dive into how female sexuality works.

While science has always said female sexuality is different from male sexuality, Nagoski takes a new approach based on science discovered while trying to create Viagra for women.

The sexual wellness book begins by explaining how each female has her own sexual fingerprint—no woman's sexual response system is identical.

Essentially, Come as You Are breathes this critical message:

  • Sex happens in the context of everyday life, not as a side event
  • How women feel about sex and their own sexuality means everything
  • Learning to influence all the factors that go into sex changes the game—substantially

When women learn these three things, their ability to create the best sex possible grows immensely stronger.

The book is a collaboration of sexual self-awareness and self-help and hardcore science but broken down in such an accessible way that the lessons are easy to grasp and use.


These books cover a variety of topics, most of them sexual nature.

If you’ve never read one that covers sexual wellness, any one of these seven should be a great first step into the world of sexual wellness literature.

There’s always a lot to take from them, and you can always apply what you learn into your daily lives to great success.

The Promescent Team

The Promescent Team

Our team has over a decade of experience in the sexual wellness field and are experts in sexual dysfunctions, like premature ejaculation. We help couples and individuals better understand treatment options available for different types of sexual needs and educate the public on all things related to intimacy. All of our authored content is medically reviewed for accuracy and reliability.

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