A guide to personal lubricants, when to use them, and what to avoid.
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Let’s be real—lubrication can make sex more comfortable, pleasurable, and stress-free. Whether you’re dealing with dryness, exploring new sensations, or just want a smoother experience, lube can be a game-changer. But with so many types out there—and a few popular household items people think are safe—it’s easy to feel overwhelmed or misinformed.
This guide is here to cut through the confusion. We’ll walk you through the main categories of lubricants, when and how to use them, and which substances should never go near your most sensitive areas. Whether you’re flying solo, with a partner, or navigating menopause or ED, the right lube can enhance intimacy and protect your health.
Let’s dive into everything you need to know.
At its core, sexual lubricant is any substance used to reduce friction during sexual activity. While the body can produce its own natural lubrication—primarily through arousal—not everyone produces enough, and even those who do may find added lube makes the experience more comfortable or pleasurable.
There are many reasons someone might reach for a lubricant, and all of them are valid:
Lube isn’t just about avoiding pain—it’s about increasing pleasure. It can reduce irritation, help prevent microtears that increase the risk of STIs, and make sex more relaxed and satisfying overall. For many couples, using lube becomes a normal, even playful part of foreplay and intimacy.
And it's not just for those dealing with dryness or difficulty. Plenty of sexually active adults use lube to enhance sensation and add comfort, no matter their age or situation. It’s a small addition with a big payoff.
Not all lubes are created equal—and choosing the right one can make all the difference. From water-based to silicone blends, each type has its own pros and cons depending on your body, preferences, and how you plan to use it.
Best for: everyday use, compatibility with condoms and sex toys
Water-based lubes are the most popular and widely available. They’re easy to clean, safe with latex condoms, and compatible with almost all toys—especially those made of silicone, which can degrade with other lube types.
Pros:
Cons:
Water-based lubes are a solid choice for most people and often recommended for first-time users.
Best for: long-lasting glide, shower or bath play
Silicone lubes are known for their silky texture and impressive staying power. Because they don’t evaporate as quickly as water-based lubes, they’re perfect for prolonged play or situations where you need durability—like water sex or anal play.
Pros:
Cons:
If you use silicone toys, double-check compatibility or stick to water-based options.
Best for: massage and some types of partner play (not involving latex)
These lubes include natural oils (like coconut or almond oil) and synthetic oils (like mineral oil or petroleum jelly). While they can feel luxurious and moisturizing, they come with caveats.
Pros:
Cons:
Oil-based lubes are best for external play or when pregnancy/STI protection isn’t a concern.
Best for: combining smoothness and compatibility
These are blends—usually of water and silicone—that offer the best of both worlds. Hybrid lubes are slicker and longer-lasting than water-based alone but still easier to clean than pure silicone.
Pros:
Cons:
A good hybrid can be a versatile option for couples who want variety without constantly switching products.
Beyond the basic categories, there’s a whole world of specialty lubricants designed to enhance sensation, support specific types of play, or address unique needs. Here’s a closer look at some of the most common varieties:
Sensory lubes are designed to add an extra dimension to sex through temperature or taste.
Note: These lubes may contain additional ingredients like glycerin or menthol, so patch-testing or checking for sensitivities is a smart move.
Anal tissue doesn’t self-lubricate, so added lube is absolutely essential for comfort and safety.
Look for labels that say "anal-safe" and opt for thicker formulas that reduce friction more effectively.
It’s worth distinguishing between lubricants (used during sex) and vaginal moisturizers (used regularly to relieve chronic dryness).
If you experience ongoing dryness—especially related to menopause or medications—it may help to use both types.
Promescent offers lubricants that go beyond the basics. Designed for enhanced pleasure and sensitivity control, their products include:
These options are ideal for couples looking to tailor their experience with added intention and care.
When you're in the moment, grabbing whatever’s nearby might seem like a good idea—but certain household products can cause more harm than good when used as lubricants. Here’s what to steer clear of and why.
You might’ve heard that these are “natural” or harmless, but they’re not designed for internal use—and they can mess with your body’s delicate balance.
If it’s not labeled as a sexual lubricant—or doesn’t explicitly state that it’s safe for internal use—it’s better to skip it. Your body (and your partner) will thank you.
With so many options on the shelf, picking the right lubricant can feel overwhelming. But the key is knowing your needs, your body, and the context in which you'll be using it. Here's how to narrow it down.
Here’s what to check:
It may take some trial and error to find your perfect match—and that’s okay. If one type doesn’t work for you, try another. You deserve comfort and pleasure that works for your body.
For far too long, lubricant has been viewed as something only necessary when “something’s wrong.” But the truth is, lube is one of the simplest, most effective tools for enhancing comfort, pleasure, and connection—at any age and in any kind of sexual relationship.
Using lubricant doesn’t mean your body is failing or that you’re “not into it enough.” It means you’re paying attention to what you and your partner need for a more enjoyable experience. From young couples to those navigating changes in hormones or health, lube is a smart, respectful choice—not a last resort.
Choosing to use lube can open the door to better communication with your partner about what feels good, what doesn’t, and how to support each other’s needs. It can also reduce the anxiety or discomfort that sometimes comes with dryness, ED, or longer sessions.
Promescent products, for example, are designed to be part of this conversation—not just enhancing performance, but helping couples feel more in sync and more confident in their sexual well-being.
If you’re experiencing persistent dryness, irritation, or pain during sex—even with lubrication—it’s worth speaking to a healthcare provider. These symptoms can be linked to hormonal shifts, medical conditions, or medications, and deserve thoughtful care.
Not always—but it can make a big difference. Lube reduces friction, enhances comfort, and can help prevent irritation or microtears. It’s helpful for anyone, whether you’re dealing with dryness, exploring new things, or just want a smoother, more pleasurable experience.
Water-based lubricants are usually the most versatile for everyday use. They’re condom- and toy-safe, easy to clean, and gentle on the body.
It depends. Silicone-based lubes can damage silicone toys over time. If you’re using silicone toys, stick to water-based or hybrid lubricants unless the toy manufacturer says otherwise.
Not really. Coconut oil can disrupt vaginal pH, trap bacteria, and isn’t safe to use with latex condoms. Stick to lubes specifically made for sexual activity.
Silicone-based lubes or thick, anal-specific water-based formulas are ideal. Anal sex requires more lubrication and staying power since the area doesn’t self-lubricate.
Yes. Look for pH-balanced water-based lubricants and consider using a vaginal moisturizer regularly. These products can offer both immediate and ongoing relief.
Flavored lubes are safe when designed for sexual use—but always check that they’re sugar-free to avoid yeast infections, and avoid using them internally unless the label says it’s safe.
Avoid lubes with glycerin, parabens, dyes, fragrances, or alcohols if you have sensitive skin or are prone to infections. Always read the label before using.
It’s not recommended. Saliva dries out quickly and can introduce bacteria to sensitive areas, increasing the risk of infections.
Think about your needs: skin sensitivity, toy use, condom compatibility, and the kind of sex you’re having. Trying new producs is a great way to find the right product that feels good and supports your experience.
Lube is one of the easiest ways to make sex better—more pleasurable, more comfortable, and more connected. Whether you’re new to using it or just exploring new options, this guide is here to help you feel informed, empowered, and excited about enhancing your sexual health.
You deserve intimacy that feels good—and the right lube can help get you there.
Our team has over a decade of experience in the sexual wellness field and are experts in sexual dysfunctions, like premature ejaculation. We help couples and individuals better understand treatment options available for different types of sexual needs and educate the public on all things related to intimacy. All of our authored content is medically reviewed for accuracy and reliability.
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