The Art of Sexting: Tips, Guidelines & Examples for Men

Sexting has become quite popular over the past few years. We'll teach you how to do it safely and effectively.

The Promescent Team
Hands on, practical experience – this is our expertise
by The Promescent Team Last updated 12/11/2023
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There is an art to sexting so we've written this guide to give you the best sexting tips on the market.

These days, smartphones have changed a lot in regards to how we interact with the world. The average American today, sends and receives nearly 94 texts a day.

With so many texts being sent on a daily basis, it would be silly to ignore the number of intimate communications being passed along.

Now, it's never been easier to communicate with others, either by phone, text, or email.

Since technology has become such a ubiquitous part of our lives, it's only natural for people to use it for sexual purposes.

Sexting has become more of a cultural norm, with individuals of all ages, both teens and adults, sending sexts to each other all of the time.

best sexting tips men

Quick FAQs

Sexting is sending or receiving sexually explicit messages or images between yourself and someone you may or may not know.

There are risks with sexting with someone you have never met, particularly if you are sharing nude images. Determine your own risk tolerance and be cautious.

For some, yes. It can lead to turbulence in an existing relationship or potenitally leaked private images you otherwise wouldn't want.

Ultimately, it is a personal choice whether you decide to sext or not. Sexting can lead to heightened arousal with a long-term partner, however, sending sexually explicit content to someone you do not know very well may be offensive. Never send unsolicited pictures or messages.

The Kinsey Institute, which studies sexual behavior, conducted a study in late 2019.

According to their research, 37 percent of participants had sexted with someone they knew, while another 31 percent engaged in phone sex.

However, while it may be relatively commonplace, there is a right way to do it.

In this article, we're going to give you various sexting ideas, examples and go over how to sext correctly. So, let's get started

What is Sexting and Why is it So Popular?

First, let's break down the act itself.

On the surface, sexting might seem similar to texting, just with erotic overtones.

However, the act of sexting goes beyond a few naughty emojis and graphic language.

Usually, the practice can heighten sexual intimacy between you and your partner.

You’re both acting out a fantasy and playing a role. So, the more you get into it, the more erotic it becomes.

What makes sexting so enticing is that it can be as graphic or playful as you like.

There is a certain finesse to the process that can make it even more alluring, particularly for first-timers.

If you've never sexted before, you may be wondering if it's worth the effort.

When done correctly, it can be highly intoxicating, especially when both of you are into it.

Best of all, it can be a mix of words, emojis, and photos, making it a multifaceted activity.

Here’s a quick example of an opening sext you can send to your partner.

“I can’t stop thinking about you. I’m imagining my hands running all over your sensual curves.”

These days, with COVID-19 running rampant, sexting may be the safest form of erotic pleasure between you and your partner.

While physical intimacy is always the best option, it might not be feasible to have sex safely.

Fortunately, the coronavirus can't be transmitted through text chains.

Top Sexting Tips for Men

Top tips of sexting for men

One of the primary challenges with sexting is that it can be boring if you don't do it right.

Also, since you're sending lewd and tawdry material back and forth, you have to be sure that your partner is willing to participate.

So, it's best to think of sexting as an art, not a simple communication method.

Because there can be so many layers to it, you should be creative and tactful.

Fortunately, we've compiled a list of great sexting tips and guidelines that can make your next session steamy and tastefully erotic.

Here's what you need to know.

1. Don't Send Unsolicited Pics

First things first - don't send an uncensored pic unless asked.

We're unsure why so many guys are eager to share photos of their penises to unprepared recipients, but it's a practice that has to die quickly.

According to research, up to 15 percent of sexts are non-consensual among teens and emerging adults, which illustrates that the problem starts at a relatively young age.

Another study reported that almost half of women have received a dick pic, with 91 percent of those receiving unsolicited ones as well.

This study was conducted with adults between 18 and 91 years old and with varying sexual orientations and identities.

Unsolicited private part pics send the (literal) wrong message, and it’s illegal.

Sexting without consent is considered sexual assault, so you never want to put yourself or the other person in that situation.

Instead, sexting should be a playful back-and-forth.

Under the right circumstances, a penis pic can take sexting to the next level when it is requested.

Here's a quick sexting tip: always leave them wanting more.

If your partner sees your “Johnson” immediately. Where's the anticipation? Where's the buildup?

2. Be Open and Upfront

Even if you don't send photos, sexting can be off-putting when it's unwanted.

If you're in the mood to sext, be sure to let your partner know what's going on before getting too far along.

As with all intimate sessions, consent is crucial.

Without it, you’re creating a dangerous situation for both you and your partner. As a general rule, if you are ever in doubt, don’t do it.

In most cases, you can be upfront but avoid saying things like, "Hey, wanna sext?"

Instead, you can utilize innuendo and double-entendres to get your message across without being too dirty.

A text like, "I wanna see those curves," is far better and can serve as a springboard for more revealing material.

3. Be Courteous and Respectful

If your partner isn't interested in sexting, don't press the issue.

Nothing is as much of a turn-off as someone who is too aggressive or inconsiderate, and it's also a good way to get blocked forever.

What's also crucial to remember is that this rule always applies.

Even if you've sexted with your partner before, that's not an open invitation to get sexual whenever you like.

Just as you should never force yourself on someone physically, don't force your partner into something they don't want (seriously, never).

Also, it's worth noting that backing off respectfully will make you stand out more.

Patience is a virtue in both life and sexting - don't rush it and ruin the situation.

4. Sext Timing is Everything

Sometimes, your partner may not want to sext because they aren’t in the mood.

In other cases, it could just be the wrong time for erotic texts.

For example, if your partner is at a work meeting, they aren’t likely to get hot and heavy.

Hopefully, you'll be aware of your partner's schedule so that you can work around it accordingly.

However, no matter what, remember the above tip - if he or she isn't biting, it's best to leave it alone.

5. Always Give a Heads Up Before Sending Explicit Pics

Once you've started sexting, there should be a natural progression of messages.

Perhaps you started with playful innuendo, and now you're getting really dirty. While this may be an excellent time to bust out the old penis pic, don't overstep your boundaries.

Before hitting send on that photo, be sure to ask if your partner wants to see it.

Remember, non-consensual nudes is a form of sexual assault, so the wrong move could come with a heavy price.

Also, you never want to violate your partner’s trust.

This rule should also apply for future sexting sessions.

Or, if you're going to start things off with a picture, make sure that it's erotic without being too explicit.

Perhaps a mirror photo of you without pants, but with your lower hips off by the countertop.

This way, you're signaling your intentions without getting too wild upfront.

Finally, keep in mind that consent always matters.

Whether you’ve been together for a few days or decades, you need to establish clear boundaries with your partner.

Never assume that you have the green light - always ask.

6. Learning Advanced Sexting Tips

Once you both have started sending pictures to each other, you want to mix them up regularly.

Variety will keep the mood fresh, so you should have a library of images at the ready.

Chances are you won't be able to snap a photo on the fly, so having some locked deep within your phone's memory banks can prove useful.

Just make sure that no one can find them too easily, particularly if you let others use your phone (i.e., your kids).

Here are a few apps that can help you store and share nudes easily without getting caught.

  • KeepSafe - Encrypt your photos with a PIN or biometric lock. KeepSafe bills itself as “military-grade” encryption, so you can feel confident that your nudes won’t leak out.
  • Private Photo Vault - Along with encryption and PIN-protection, you can create decoy folders in your photo library. This way, even the most talented snoopers won’t get access.
  • Confide - When sending your prized pics, we recommend an app that will delete the message instantly. While Snapchat will notify you if someone screenshots your images, Confide will bounce them out and blur the picture.

Sexting Tips and Examples to Up Your Game

sexting ideas to up your game

Now that we've covered the ground rules, let's dive into some sexting ideas to get you started.

Remember, there is an art to sexting, so don't get ahead of yourself.

That being said, if your partner takes things to the next level right away, feel free to match their energy.

For example, if they send a naked photo, then you can bust out one of your own.

Think of texting like a tango - as you advance, your partner retreats, and vice versa.

The dance works best when you're both in sync.

Best Sexting Openers

As we mentioned, when initiating contact, you want to be direct without getting too explicit.

Since there's always the chance your partner isn't in the mood, you want to be able to tone it down quickly if necessary.

Here are some great opening lines to spur your next session.

  • "Hey baby, I can't stop thinking about that body."
  • "You've been on my mind all day, and my pants are getting tight. Can you help me loosen them?"
  • "Those curves of yours are dangerous; I could get lost in them all night long."
  • "I was just thinking about you, and how much I want to get inside those pants."
  • “I’ve been thinking about those lips and how good they can make me feel.”
  • “I’m feeling a bit cold, can I rub my body against yours for warmth?”

More Examples & Tips When Sexting

Once you've got the ball rolling and your partner has taken the bait, now is the time to start ramping up your sexting game.

Depending on the situation, you may dive into graphics, or you might want to continue the dance of innuendo and double-speak.

Here are a few examples of each.

  • "I've been imagining what I want to do to you, and it's driving me crazy."
  • "I’m ready to have a hot and steamy workout with you all night long."
  • "Baby, you must be Medusa, because I am rock hard right now."
  • "I can't wait to run my tongue all over your body. I'm starving."
  • "As soon as I see you, I'm going to rip off those clothes and start pounding."

The Follow-Through

If you follow these sexting tips accordingly, you'll notice that the best sexting sessions are the ones where you describe the erotic things you'll be doing to each other in person.

Once you've done the warm-up, it's time to dive into the raunchy stuff.

Ideally, you'll both be so turned on that you'll either have to meet up ASAP, or you'll need to rub one out.

If you're going to do the latter, why not include your partner?

Let your partner know that you just have to get some release, and you can't wait.

Then, send some photo proof of your arousal.

  • "I'm going to thrust my fingers inside of you and make you scream with pleasure."
  • "I'm going to pour chocolate syrup all over your body and then lick it off."
  • "I can't even wait to reach the bedroom. As soon as I see you, these pants are coming off."
  • "Tell me what that mouth can do, and I'll do the same."
  • "I'm so hard right now, I can't wait any longer. Want to watch?"
  • "Show me how aroused you are. I want to see that dripping wet underwear."

How You Should Send Sexting Pics

While sexting can be fun with just words and emojis, pictures can really elevate the experience.

Best of all, when you're both sending nudes or partial-nudes, it can heighten the thrill and generate far more excitement.

That being said, since we live in an era where photos can wind up on the internet, here are a few tips to ensure that your sexts will satisfy your partner and protect your identity.

  • Obscure Your Face - Or don't show it at all. This way, there's plausible deniability if your partner decides to show them to anyone else.
  • Turn Off Location-Tagging - Smartphones automatically tag your geolocation whenever you take a picture. You can go into your settings and turn this off. The fewer details attached to the image, the better.
  • Practice With Different Angles - While there are only so many ways to take a picture of your crotch, try a few options before hitting send. Also, consider lighting and how it affects the final photo.
  • Be Aware of Tattoos or Body Marks - Anything unique that can be tied to you directly could be a problem if the picture leaks out. Be sure to obscure these items as much as possible.
  • Ask What Your Partner Wants to See - Getting your partner's input is a surefire way to spark the mood and keep them engaged.

A Brief Guide to Emoji Sexting Tips

Emojis have come a long way from the simple emoticons of yesteryear.

These graphics are a quick and easy way to illustrate your point without having to go into too much detail.

Feel free to sprinkle these in whenever possible to enhance your messages.

Also, be aware that some emoji sets don't necessarily translate well across devices.

For example, if you have an iPhone and your partner has an Android, some emojis may get lost in translation.

That being said, here are some common emoji sexting ideas that are sure to set the mood.

  • 🍆 Eggplant - Penis
  • 🍌 Banana - Penis
  • 🐱 Pussycat - Vulva
  • 🍩 Donut Hole - Anus
  • 👈 Finger Pointing - Fingering or full penetration
  • 🍑 Peach - Ass
  • 💦 Sweat Droplets - You’re making me wet, or an orgasm
  • 🎆 Fireworks - Orgasm
  • 🌋 Volcano - Orgasm
  • 😈 Smiley Face w/ Horns - Feeling horny or naughty
  • 👅 Tongue - Oral sex
  • 🦴 Bone - Either a penis or the act of boning

While these emojis are easy to grasp, feel free to get creative with your sexting ideas.

Although it’s fun to use emojis, don’t overdo it.

Too many can make your messages too playful and potentially silly or cartoonish.

You may be able to sext with emojis and nothing else. Just make sure that you don't have to stop the session to explain what you're trying to say.

If you're not sure that the message is clear, add some text to fill in the gaps.

The Bottom Line: Sexting Can Be Fun When Used Correctly

Sexting can enhance your relationship, whether you've been with your partner for years or you just met a few days ago.

More and more committed partners are opening up to the idea of sexting tips, with senior citizens even getting in on the action.

Regardless of your situation, the critical point to remember is that it's a back-and-forth exchange.

If you're the only one getting into it or sending pictures, chances are your partner is not enjoying it.

Sexting should be playful, fun, and exciting.

It offers an opportunity to get outside of your comfort zone and explore each other in a new and unique way.

As long as you remember these guidelines and tips for sexting, your sessions should be both erotic and pleasurable.

Overall, just remember to be safe and to sext responsibly 😉.

The Promescent Team

The Promescent Team

Our team has over a decade of experience in the sexual wellness field and are experts in sexual dysfunctions, like premature ejaculation. We help couples and individuals better understand treatment options available for different types of sexual needs and educate the public on all things related to intimacy. All of our authored content is medically reviewed for accuracy and reliability.

Sources:

Absorption Pharmaceuticals LLC (Promescent) has strict informational citing guidelines and relies on peer-reviewed studies, academic or research institutions, medical associations, and medical experts. We attempt to use primary sources and refrain from using tertiary references and only citing trustworthy sources. Each article is reviewed, written, and updated by Medical Professionals or authoritative Experts in a specific, related field of practice. You can find out more about how we ensure our content is accurate and current by reading our editorial policy.

  • Alexandra S. Marcotte, Amanda N. Gesselman, Helen E. Fisher & Justin R. Garcia. 2020, July 2. Women’s and Men’s Reactions to Receiving Unsolicited Genital Images from Men. The Journal of Sex Research. https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/00224499.2020.1779171?journalCode=hjsr20
  • Camille Mori, Jessica E. Cooke, Jeff R. Temple, Anh Ly, Yu Lu, Nina Anderson, Christina Rash & Sheri Madigan. 2020, February 18. The Prevalence of Sexting Behaviors Among Emerging Adults: A Meta-Analysis. Springer Link. https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10508-020-01656-4
  • The Kinsey Institute Staff. 2019, November 21. Kinsey Institute 'Sex Tech' study finds technology facilitates sexual and emotional interactions. the Kinsey Institute. https://kinseyinstitute.org/news-events/news/2019-11-21-sex-tech.php
  • Kenneth Burke. 2016, May 18. How Many Texts Do People Send Every Day (2018)?. Text Request. https://www.textrequest.com/blog/how-many-texts-people-send-per-day/#:~:text=On%20average%2C%20Americans%20send%20and%20receive%20about%2094,isn%E2%80%99t%20going%20through%20that%20many%20texts%20per%20day.
The Content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition.

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