The Orgasm Gap & What You Can Do About It

They say that men are from Mars and women are from Venus – but is it true? Are we really all that different? When it comes to sex…apparently yes, we are. It’s no secret that women usually take longer to have an orgasm than men do. On average, men take about 5.5 minutes to reach an orgasm, whereas women, according to some studies, take an average of about 17 minutes! That’s more than 3 times longer than their partner! Why are we so different when it comes to sex? Part of this stems from what’s commonly referred to as the “orgasm gap.”

What is the Orgasm Gap?

The orgasm gap is in essence the difference between the male and female orgasm. Part of it stems from the fact that men have more orgasms than women, and the other part is the difference in time it takes for a female to reach an orgasm after her male partner has. It’s actually a very well-researched topic, which has enough science behind it to be considered a valid – albeit unfair – disparage between the sexes. Perhaps it’s our perception of what sex actually is that gets in the way when it comes to achieving an orgasm. Is sex different than foreplay? Is it only what happens after penetration? Or, could sex include foreplay? And if the answer to that is yes, then could we begin to close this unfair gap, simply by changing our perception of what sex is?

Are men supposed to reach orgasm first? Are they more sensual and easily aroused, so they climax faster? What is it about men and women that makes this even a “thing”? And even more intriguing than the fact that an orgasm gap is a “thing” and does occur, is why does it happen? When 40 percent of women report experiencing sexual dissatisfaction, it’s worth looking a little deeper into.

Why Does the Orgasm Gap Exist?

There are several reasons why the orgasm gap exists. Some are biological reasons while others are psychological, but overwhelmingly, studies show time and again, men in general have a more satisfying sex life than their female partners do. Why? There are several reasons, but here are our top three:

  • Insecurities – Women may be more insecure and less willing to enjoy the moment, so to speak. If a woman is feeling self-conscious, she may not be able to release her inhibitions enough to relax and truly let go, and the end result might just be an inability to reach orgasm.
  • Male Orgasm Priority – Societal expectations may be leaking into the bedroom. In a male-dominated world, could it be that we’ve even let the male orgasm take precedence over the female?
  • Lack of Sexual Education – We teach our young women and men abstinence, not pleasure, so it could be that women don’t have a realistic, let alone basic, understanding of their own bodies and how to feel, or attain, pleasure.
  • Basic Physiology of Sex – The most important reason for the Orgasm Gap may lie in the anatomy of the penis and clitoris, considering their respective sizes, locations on the body and sexual function. Needless to say, the penis is required for intercourse and the clitoris is not. So, during intercourse, the penis receives maximum stimulation while the clitoris, without some type of manual stimulation is receiving little. Studies have shown that, with manual stimulation (e.g. a vibrator), women can achieve orgasm in similar times (5-6 minutes) as men.

How to Delay Orgasm

It’s not rocket science – most women like sex and want it to last longer as much as men do. We don’t need to pour over studies or read a ton of articles to come to the conclusion that longer sex could result in a better experience for both the woman and the man. The longer “it” goes, the better the chance of reaching an orgasm, thus closing the orgasm gap.

So, how can a man delay orgasm to give his partner a better chance of reaching hers? There are several treatment options out there that men can try in hopes of delaying their orgasm. There is the start-stop method, the squeeze technique, or wearing a condom. He can try a pill (prescription or herbal) or even one of the gels or wipes that are available and claim to delay ejaculation.

Or, there is Promescent. Promescent is an over-the-counter (OTC) delay spray that can let some men last up to 64 percent longer. Promescent has a patented technology that’s unlike any other spray on the market. It’s also the only product available in the U.S. that’s backed by clinical research. Promescent is so effective, even doctors and sex therapists recommend it to men looking for a way to delay their ejaculation. The next time you have sex, begin to close the orgasm gap with Promescent.

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