Phone sex has evolved beyond basic dirty talk. It can now include everything from voice to text, photos, live video, and more.
However, even the most basic phone sex can still be enjoyable. It can provide new avenues for erotic roleplay, dirty talk, and other exciting scenarios.
Quick FAQs
Phone sex is conversation between two or more people over the phone that provokes sexual arousal or is sexually explicit.
Some of the benefits of phone sex include safety from STIs, safety from pregnancy, and stress relief.
Some risks of phone sex to be careful of include having intimate photos shared, being catfished, and being coerced into sexual activities you're not comfortable with.
This guide will go over everything you need to know about phone sex, including how to have it safely and how to make it unforgettable for both partners.
So how do people have phone sex? Traditionally, it’s been understood as a conversation by two or more people over the phone that’s sexually explicit or provokes sexual arousal.
Oftentimes, it’s done by partners who are looking for ways to connect when not physically together. In other cases, phone sex may be provided as a service for payment.
However, with smartphones, it’s now soared beyond simple dirty talk and sexual encouragement.
Modern phone sex can include:
Dirty talk by voice
Erotic text messages
Revealing pictures
Links to pornography
Video calls
And more
With smartphones and the internet, people can get quite creative about how they enjoy sex over the phone. They can masturbate while on video with one another, send risqué photos, or link to pornographic videos to watch and comment on together.
Studies have found that sexual arousal is a highly mental phenomenon, and phone sex can be a great way to stimulate your mind.
When speaking over the phone, you can imagine your partner in new ways, hear new tones in their voice, and fantasize scenarios that aren’t possible when you’re physically together.
Phone sex is also a good way to practice roleplaying. Some roleplaying ideas include:
Speaking in a higher or lower voice
Speaking in an accent
Creating new scenarios, such as being a stranger or secret admirer.
Being more dominant or submissive than usual
Risks of Phone Sex
As with anything, there are some phone sex risks that you should think about before engaging.
Some of the most common risks of phone sex include:
Having your photos, videos, voice messages, or texts shared
Being coerced into sexual activities you may be uncomfortable with
Being catfished (this is when a person you’ve spoken with online is concealing their true identity)
While it may be tempting to engage in anonymous phone sex with people you’ve met online, you must be careful since you can’t fully verify their age or identity, which can cause legal problems in some cases.
For the safest practices, try to engage in phone sex only with people you know and trust, and that are of the legal age of consent.
Tips For Having Phone Sex
Phone sex may feel a bit awkward at first, but it can become an exciting and beneficial activity for both partners over time.
Plus, you can always just send a few erotic messages before committing to more intense phone sex. You can start slowly, and you can always refuse to do something if it doesn't feel right for you.
Some ideas to get you started include:
Sending a few erotic voice messages or texts at random times
Sharing fantasies
Roleplaying various scenarios
Get descriptive during your conversation. Use your imagination, and create a scenario based on your own desires to make it truly convincing.
You can also tell your partner to use certain toys or products, like a bullet vibrator or a warming female arousal gel. This can help to bring the fantasy closer to life.
The more creative you get, the better it will be for both partners.
Tips For Safe Phone Sex
As with any sexual activity, it’s important to have clear boundaries set before beginning. If you’re talking with a partner, ask them:
Are they ok with photos being sent?
Are they ok roleplaying, and if so, about what?
Are they ok with links to pornography being sent?
If you plan on sending photos to one another, have rules beforehand on what should be sent. Even if you trust your partner, a phone can always be lost or hacked.
In some cases, it may be best to send teasing photos without your face or other identifying markers such as:
Along with phone sex, there are other similar practices that can spice up your sex life and bring new experiences into the bedroom.
Some top alternatives to phone sex include:
Mutual Masturbation
This can be done in person or over video chat, and it involves masturbation alongside your partner. You can include dirty talk, directions, or just moaning to make the experience unforgettable.
Handwritten Letters
Whether sent through the mail or left on the bed, a handwritten erotic letter can be a unique and invigorating act that’s worth trying.
While texts can be exciting, an erotic note that’s handwritten and physically available can be more personal.
This is something many partners are unlikely to experience in modern times, but it’s an age-old practice that can add something new to the bedroom.
Denial Games
Try denying your partner, and have them deny you, by telling them when they can or cannot orgasm.
Maybe tell them they can’t orgasm until a certain date, and you can then tease them up until that point. Or tell them they won’t know when they will be allowed to orgasm, using the element of surprise to build up the tension.
Takeaways
Phone sex is a fun way to explore your sexuality further. While it's fairly safe, there are some risks if it's done with people you don't know.
Always make sure to protect your privacy in the event something is leaked. Be sure you trust and know the person you’re having phone sex with.
Remember that you don't have to push your boundaries beyond where you're comfortable.
By following these tips, you can safely explore your sexuality and gain new experiences with role play, dirty talk, and more by having sex on the phone.
Our team has over a decade of experience in the sexual wellness field and are experts in sexual dysfunctions, like premature ejaculation. We help couples and individuals better understand treatment options available for different types of sexual needs and educate the public on all things related to intimacy. All of our authored content is medically reviewed for accuracy and reliability.
Sources:
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